31-derful Options

Leaving the psychiatrist's office with a new game plan (or rather the same one that I will follow more closely this time), Reid and I were early arrivals at Allie's bus stop. I decided to spring for a cookie, cinnamon roll, and iced mocha at the neighborhood bakery there. On familiar turf with the rarity of time to spare, the cloud lifted.

A song lyric rang through my mind...it's gonna be alright....

"Reid, who sings that song? It's gonna be...," I asked the master dj. Quicker than a Shazam app, he spouted back, "Sara Groves! It's on Add to the Beauty," then proceeded to sing the rest of the album. Just like Toucan Sam, he always knows.

Hope springs eternal. As the good doc offered, "If this doesn't work, I have 31 others we can try." Hmmm...that brings to mind another foundational hymn to bear in mind:

My hope is built on nothing less

Than Jesus Christ, my righteousness.

I dare not trust in (doctors or meds),

But wholly lean on Jesus' name.

Sing it with me now

On Christ the solid Rock I stand;

All other ground is sinking sand,

All other ground is sinking sand.

Holy Ground

Reid will be baptized this Saturday in the ocean near our house. I am not sure exactly what to expect but I hold myself open to some awesome possibilities. We are setting apart holy ground by calling upon the name of the Lord. Since He will be present, it will be grand! 

Sara Groves wrote the song, "What Do I Know," about her friendship with a senior approaching death. She can't imagine what heaven is like, nor can her friend. But we can trust God's word and what He promises is all good. Click the link to hear the song or read some of the lyrics here:

Well, I don't know that there are harps in heaven,
Or the process for earning your wings.
And I don't know of bright lights at the ends of tunnels,
Or any of these things.

But I know to be absent from this body is to be present with the Lord,
and from what I know of him, that must be pretty good.

I remember Allie's baptism last October. It was as if the words of the Lord's Prayer became reality--"your kingdom come, here on earth as it is in Heaven." God enters into our existence in a tangible way through the sacrament of baptism and through the praises of His people. Although marriage is not a directive from God, it is a similar public profession before God and man. Take a minute to view this clip; the wedding scene from The Other Sister.

Purity of heart is beautiful to God. From His perspective and compared to His perfection, we must all seem impaired and helplessly disabled yet, nonetheless dear to Him.  In this clip, the couple fumbles over the mechanics of exchanging their vows. Ironically, it is the very fumbling that amplifies the meaning and passion of their intent. Their joy cannot be suppressed and they manage to express more through their disability than any "normal" couple I've ever seen. Their experience becomes universally enviable. I end up wishing for what they have: the ability to be wholly honest, genuine, and natural.

Reminds me of another song. "Undignified" by Dave Crowder band is a call to live for God and not for man.  This link will let you listen to the lyrics which are straight out of 2 Samuel 6 when King David dances naked in the street before God much to the dismay and scorn of his wife, Michal.  She is worried about many things primarily their reputation.  As it says, "Nothing Lord should hinder the passion in my soul."  Reid and others walking among us with autism--in spite of or maybe because of their diagnoses--live this out.  Reid could care less what others think of him.  Hard as we try to teach him a social consciousness, he remains refreshingly uninhibited and undaunted in his joy in the Lord, his affection for others and his love of life.  Woe to me to un-teach this exuberance. God must enjoy him as much as He did David.

Could this be one of God's reasons for allowing disability? Could it be for our benefit? Are there lessons we (neurotypicals) can learn only through their example?

We spend a lot of time, money and effort teaching Reid social appropriateness (a word I have come to despise). While it is critical for his future on this earth, I wonder how necessary it will be in eternity. Just for Saturday, I "will lay my pride by the side" as the Dave Crowder song says, and let Reid be who he is before God and man (even if that means dancing naked on the beach). Did I say that?

David said to Michal, "I will celebrate before the LORD. I will become even more undignified than this, and I will be humiliated in my own eyes." 2 Samuel 6:21-22

Now to him who is able to do immeasurably more than all we ask or imagine...be glory in the church and in Christ Jesus throughout all generations, for ever and ever! Ephesians 3:19-21

Whatever you do, work at it with all your heart, as working for the Lord, not for men, since you know that you will receive an inheritance from the Lord as a reward. It is the Lord Christ you are serving. Colossians 3:23-24

photo credit:  leucadia.blogspot.com

In Whose Presence?

It is a well known fact that many variables impact our kids' behavior.  I notice that Reid is very sensitive to people's expectations of him.  With someone who knows his personal best, he does nothing less.  With others, who are just meeting him and may make false assumptions that he is non-verbal or "unable" in some area, he stoops to that lowest denominator and those skills appear dormant. Whether he is believing their lie about him or just taking the easy road when possible, it is confounding to keep him motivated let alone raise the bar to his full potential. 

After a recent appointment with our chiropractor I found myself telling a friend that, "I like who Reid is in his presence."  Well, that sounded vaguely Biblical and dangerously heretical. Good fodder for blogging!  

Dr. Phillips is a fabulous man and skilled practitioner who we've seen once a month for more than two years.  At our last appointment, Reid was in rare form.  He has the doctor's spiel down pat--from the initial greeting at the door (in perfect intonation) to every inquiry in exact sequence as the appointment proceeds.  Thanks to Dr. Phillips' consistency and our repetition of going, Reid has worked out a stageworthy impersonation of this man.

This may be a case where "you had to be there" but let me try to convey our humor, surprise, and delight.  Part of understanding this also requires that you are a bit familiar with muscle checking, applied kinesiology and chiropractic--which could be good thing for what ails ya'.  

Dr. P:  Good Morning Reid!  How are you today?

R:  Good Morning Dr. Phillips! You are the best man in the whole...

Dr. P:  Aw thanks Reid.

Who can help but smile at that kind of affirmation and generous praise? (My husband took a bit of offense that night at the dinner table.  We reminded him that he has the honorable distinction of being the "best dad in the world" and Reid did catch himself before finishing the sentence.)

As Dr. Phillips proceeded the checklist of NET points had a familiar ring to me. To Reid, it was more than just familiar; he knows it verbatim. At his peak attentiveness that day, he anticipated each one. He beat Dr. Phillips to the punch more than once: "conception to birth," "personalized will" (which he mistook for "paralyzed will" which Dr. P had skipped)!  Reid seemed to be vying for his job.

 I love who Reid was in the presence of that man for those 20 minutes. He can enter that office having been vegged out on videos and act like a pill the minute he's back in the car, but for those 20 minutes his power was "on!" I really want everyone who interacts with him to hold that as a new baseline so he can generalize that gregarious, engaged, conversationalist, confident self into other settings! 

As much as the fabulous treatments, I value Dr. Phillips for the role model he is to Reid of a caring, tender, man diligently working in a helping profession, serving his clients with patience, warmth, and intuition.

When Moses descended the mountain after time with God, he had a glow, a radiance, a definite light which all the Israelites noticed.  He reflected the immense glory of our Father in Heaven who would blind us if we but gazed upon Him. Reminds me of the song You Are the Sun by Sara Groves?

You are the sun shining down on everyone

Light of the world giving light to everything I see
Beauty so brilliant I can hardly take it in
And everywhere you are is warmth and light

And I am the moon with no light of my own
Still you have made me to shine
And as I glow in this cold dark night
I know I can’t be a light unless I turn my face to you

Whose presence brings out the best in you? Have you been in the presence of the Lord lately? Is it apparent to those around you? In His presence, God renews us, changes our name, makes us white as snow, loves us, fills us up with His Spirit, delights in us. He sees us in our completion and fulfillment in Christ. THAT changes our potential!

...whenever Moses entered the LORD's presence to speak with him...they saw that his face was radiant.  Exodus 34:34-35

The LORD replied, "My Presence will go with you, and I will give you rest." Then Moses said to him, "If your Presence does not go with us, do not send us up from here. What else will distinguish me and your people from all the other people on the face of the earth?" 

Exodus 33:14-15

photo credits: switchedonliving.com, blandingchiropractic.com