A Friend In Deed

I have been reading Tim McGinnis' StrengthsFinder blog and happened upon this Trombone Player Wanted film series. Marcus Buckingham creatively makes his point with a boy in the school band who is a natural percussionist but has been told to play trombone. Let this whet your appetite.




If kids instinctively know their strengths, then our role as parents is to enhance their pursuit of them. It may save their lives either literally or figuratively (keep reading about Nathaniel Ayers). Kids with autism, and reams of paperwork outlining their deficits (otherwise known as IEP's) and obstacles stacked against them, desperately need our support to affirm and articulate their strengths. Arguably, it will cost them more than the "normal" population to be settle for mediocrity or be misguided.

In an odd coincidence, another performance at the Walt Disney Performing Arts Center is pivotal in Steve Lopez' true story, The Soloist. His arduous friendship with a destitute homeless man moves him from being marginalized to heroic. Lopez unlocks this man's potential using his obsession with music as the key. I'll show you this trailer if you promise to read the book first.



John Donne said, no man is an island. As an introvert, I sometimes prefer being alone. During stressors in my life, including Reid's diagnosis, my tendency is to pull inward, resign, recoil, resist. (Recall the funny scene in Father of the Bride with Steve Martin and the guard dogs?) That retreat only serves me so long. After a certain point, it is not beneficial to be alone. I need others to pull me out of my own quandry and keep me moving. So, it is easy to understand how Nathaniel Ayers, after his mother's death, basically lost his marbles.

When I see homeless people, I almost always think of the words of John Bradford (and my grandmother) who said, "There, but for the grace of God, go I." Knowing all the pieces that fit together for Reid to appear and behave as a functioning member of society, I can quickly imagine him (or any of us) in their shoes were the scaffolding to come down. What would it take for your life to come apart at the seams? A couple of "biggies"--loss of a job, the economy failing, death of a provider, hurricane, illness, a move--and any of us could be on the street needing a friend like Steve Lopez.



A friend loves at all times, and a brother is born for adversity. Proverbs 17:16-18


Wealth brings many friends, but a poor man's friend deserts him. Proverbs 19:3-5


A man of many companions may come to ruin, but there is a friend who sticks closer than a brother. Proverbs 18:23-24


The LORD would speak to Moses face to face, as a man speaks with his friend. Then Moses would return to the camp... Exodus 33:10-12

If Genius is not Normal--What Is?

What do you say when you hear someone has autism? Hard to know anymore...is it good news, bad news, or just interesting news? One of the top ten reactions I used to hear when telling others about my son is something like this, "Oh, is he really good at math? Is he one of those savants?" Well, no I don't believe he is. Reid is not savant but he is smart and skilled and capable. I am not a genius either but God thinks I am a MonaLisa!

Stephen Wiltshire, featured in the video above, is an architectural artist with unbelievable talent and a mind which clearly puts him in the autistic savant category. His achievement is inspirational and unattainable to us. Like the miracles recorded in the Bible, stories of savant accomplishment strengthen our faith and hope by their superlative extreme. Seeing mountain tops can lift us up from the valley. Even if we don't climb to the top, our eyes are set higher by knowing someone else has.

When Temple Grandin speaks, she often shows a slide of Albert Einstein's brain scan to illustrate that his genius was in fact, abnormality. Can you embrace what that really means? Would you rather be normal or a genius? Would you rather have a genius child or a normal child? The very questions strike are absurd? Alternatively, why don't we eliminate "normal" from our vocabulary? Who among us is normal? Who strives for it? Who is satisfied with it? Not one of us is normal in the eyes of God.

Brittany Maier was born fearfully and wonderfully made in the image of God with a sizable chunk (or maybe just a sliver) of His passion for music. She was also born blind, premature, and autistic. I think it is important to view savants not as freaks of nature or purely in amazement. We need to let them inspire greatness and mutual respect in us. The Wisconsin Medical Society has an awesome site devoted to savants. Perceiving others among us as talented changes their future, their self-perception, and our interactions. Try it!

"God created man in his own image, in the image of God he created him." Genesis 1:27

"With your own eyes you saw those great trials, those miraculous signs and great wonders. But to this day the LORD has not given you a mind that understands or eyes that see or ears that hear." Deuteronomy 29:3


"Every good and perfect gift is from above, coming down from the Father of the heavenly lights, who does not change like shifting shadows." James 1:17