As it is in heaven....

The truth doesn't hurt--it does make me cry though. I was surprised this article in the Orange County Register brought me to tears. Usually I don't even click on them; they've become cliche; or I'm calloused, not sure which?

In any case, this time I did and by the paragraph when Mark and Kylie get called into the principal's office, I was all choked up.

We tease my husband, Jim, that he's become so sensitive in his middle age, crying more often at chick flicks or in church. In his own defense, he has a theory that his emotional response is brought on by some pure truth. To experience guileless authenticity in stark contrast to our corrupt world touches a deep place in our hearts. A yearning we all have. Some would say, the Holy Spirit falls when the waterworks begin.

So here's the truth from God's Word that dropped into my head as my heart was poked.

What happened at that OC high school was more than kindness or charity. Kylie's initiative and the response of his peers was a tangible demonstration of God's Kingdom coming to earth as it is in heaven. Do you know--really believe?--that accepting Jesus makes us sons and daughters of the King of Kings! Literally, we are adopted into His family to receive the same inheritance--eternal life plus immeasurable riches and the right to rule.

Unfathomable, until we see it dramatized in a true story like Mark's. Who can grasp...?

Long before he laid down earth's foundations, he had us in mind, had settled on us as the focus of his love, to be made whole and holy by his love. Long, long ago he decided to adopt us into his family through Jesus Christ. (What pleasure he took in planning this!) Ephesians 1

Glory and strength to Christ, who loves us,
who blood-washed our sins from our lives,
Who made us a Kingdom, Priests for his Father,
forever—and yes, he's on his way! Revelation 1:6

Now listen, daughter, don't miss a word:
forget your country, put your home behind you.
Be here—the king is wild for you.
Since he's your lord, adore him. Psalm 45

He said to them, “When you pray, say: “‘Father, hallowed be your name, your Kingdom come. Luke 11:1-3

(I also love it because Facebook is a new, regular part of Reid's Language Arts activities at school--age appropriate and socially relevant. And could there be a better case for inclusion?)

You did click the link and read the article, right?

Taking Notes

I have no greater joy than to hear that my children are walking in the truth. 3 John 1:3-5

In God, whose word I praise, in the LORD, whose word I praise— Psalm 56:9-11

I have written before about how and why Reid sits in the sanctuary with us Sunday mornings. Nothing thrills my soul more than watching him diligently pen the key words from the sermon into his bulletin outline each week.

In a single glance down the pew, a series of images flash before my mind's eye:

...vestiges of his chubby little toddler hand...countless squatty golf pencils we collected to force a pincer grasp...hours of seemingly futile occupational therapy to correct the prehensile grasp...the vanquished hope that he would ever write his name...the introduction of an AlphaSmart keyboard goal to teach him typing instead...the accepting other approach of his private teacher Becky who simply suggested "it might be easier to hold it this way..."

...not to mention the treasure chest of rewards amassed (actually Panera cinnamon rolls) to "pay-off" staying in the pew for 2, 5, 15, then 20 minutes.......all those milestones and more that perhaps only another mother could appreciate (not to name names, but here's one).

But Mary treasured up all these things and pondered them in her heart. Luke 2:18-20

Victory comes in slow small strokes that, before you know it, spell a sentence.

Heroes and Miracles

Sitting in the stands spectating at a Miracle League baseball game Saturday morning , Allie and I took a deep breath. Having just handed Reid off to his 1:1 buddy, we knew we'd have 2 innings of relatively uninterrupted talk time. (Quality time comes in various zones.)

At a whisper she confided, "guess what that lady just said to me?"

"Is that your brother out there? Then you are a real hero."

To which she politely replied and wisely corrected, "the real heroes are the ones who sign up and show up every week to make this possible. They choose to be here. We have to do it!"

True. The miracle of this local phenomenon is the dedication, enthusiasm, and sheer volume of volunteers who create a slice of heaven on earth.

Every Saturday 12 teams of special needs kids aged 5-18 of all abilities come bedecked in uniforms ready to play ball with whatever modifications they need. An amazing announcer, Alan Moore, treats each one as an MVP coming up to bat replete with nicknames and stats from the previous season. Whether they bat from a wheelchair, standing or hand over hand, every one has a buddy and everyone gets a hit.

Reid's first time at bat, he connected with a solid hit which Mr. Moore proclaimed "a home run!" With requisite prompting, Reid ran all four bases and enjoyed the applause from the stands. Well, can I tell you, every single time since, he rounds that diamond at full tilt in a beeline back to his seat in the dugout. Whether he's fouled, bunted or slugged it, the precedent has been set. Hit = homerun in his locked tight mind. One time he passed a couple other runners in the process. No worries, no tantrums; every game ends in a tie.

Coaches range from off-duty therapists to high school age siblings. The one on one buddies come out of the woodwork of the community at large to don a flourescent t-shirt and help. Every week I see another familiar face and ask how they learned about it. Parents cheer from the stands or visit like comrades in arms; brothers and sisters are proud; players grin ear to ear.

For that one hour a week, I feel like everything is really going to turn out fine. It is miraculous!

You are the God who performs miracles; you display your power among the peoples. Psalm 77:13-15

"The King will reply, 'I tell you the truth, whatever you did for one of the least of these brothers of mine, you did for me.' Matthew 25:39-41

On Earth as it is...

Need a summer movie rental (for mature audience)? As It Is In Heaven, a Swedish film nominated for Best Foreign Film Hollywood Awards available from Netflix, is incredibly thought provoking. It is a compelling story about how to really love your neighbors. It is also a testament to the power of music to transform a entire community. And how can you speak about love without inclusion!

Tore is a young man experiencing developmental disability in the film. Some in the community call him a "cuckoo" others accept, comfort, shepherd, even learn from him. The filmmakers realistically depict the interdependence model Kathie Snow extrapolates here in her Disability Is Natural newsletter. As God would have it here on earth, Tore is not the only one with special needs who needs a little help now and then.

Despite his innocence, he is wise to tension often sensing what others miss or ignore. This closing scene is meant to intrigue not to spoil. (If you want the preview instead click here.) As the town choir takes the stage at a choral competition without their conductor, Tore takes an unplanned leadership role. The result weaves together several threads of the movie.

Life is not about being able. It is not about achievement. It is not about winning. Redemption is messy and beautiful. It requires vulnerability and courage. In some measure, both require finding your own voice and joining a chorus of others.

God has a will and a purpose in each of our lives. The conductor in the movie states his calling early in life: to open people's hearts with music. A tutor of Reid's asked me recently, "What is yours?" I hemmed and hawed awkwardly, having just met her after all. "Go ahead," she urged, "there's no one listening, just you and me, what is it?"

She was unrelenting as I stuttered in embarrassment and false pride. I choked out what was pounding in my chest but had never been articulated: to convince people that there is always hope. I was grateful for her insistence last night as Reid and I lounged in the hot tub. Out of the blue he blurted, "Mom, what's your destiny?" I had an answer!

When I turned the question on him he shot back, "to sing."

What's yours?

This, then, is how you should pray:

"Our Father in heaven, hallowed be your name,

your kingdom come, your will be done

on earth as it is in heaven.

Give us today our daily bread.

Forgive us our debts, as we also have forgiven our debtors.

And lead us not into temptation, but deliver us from the evil one.

For if you forgive men when they sin against you,

your heavenly Father will also forgive you.

But if you do not forgive men their sins,

your Father will not forgive your sins." Matthew 6

Vision Accomplished

Life holds many ironies. Here's the latest I've noticed in our life.

When Reid reached about 3rd grade, Sunday school became a virtually impossibility. Worship time was engaging but breaking into small groups for discussion was Reid's cue to wander the campus. The entirely auditory exercise without visual support was beyond his ability to comprehend.

That year, I was serving as an Age-Level Coordinator, so that I could "float" and supervise, not teach, thereby be available to troubleshoot the classroom where Reid was. Sounds great in theory but one awkward Sunday morning it all came to a head. I never officially resigned, but they knew I was done. With one desperate glance and a furtive sigh, I looked up harriedly at the interim director of Children's Ministry and said, "I can't do this!" We haven't spoken since, beyond a polite "hello," nor have I been solicited to volunteer again.

The most expedient way for us to "do church" from that point on, was to have Reid join us in the sanctuary. Although we did it under duress and stubborn refusal to skip church, let me itemize the reasons why this might be preferable in the grander scheme. I realize them only in hindsight.

1. Reid practices the adult life skill of attending in a large group

2. The service is predictable and structured, therefore "safe"

3. Leaders from the pulpit are more consistent than the Sunday school volunteers

4. He experiences worship and more music--his best comprehension channel

5. The pastors recognize Reid

6. Reid knows his pastors

7. Our church family participates in Reid's progress

8. Friends are reminded of "the least of these" Jesus came to save

9. Friends around us are blessed by Reid's uninhibited singing

10. Reid is around people with typical language and behavior to model

Any others come to mind?

Here's the irony: Our church has recently embraced a shift in perspective on Next Generation ministry. Junior and Senior High students are being included in worship once a month and there is an expressed goal of flipping the ratio commonly associated with Children's Ministry and childcare settings. 1 adult to 5 children seems a safe and nurturing ratio. The church is aiming to reverse that so that 5 adults know every 1 student by name, care about them, even pray for them as they leave for college.

For once, (or as usual?) Reid is ahead of the game. Practically everyone knows his name! Even the Panera clerk where we religiously head afterwards. She has his "usual" bear claw and lemonade plated up before we reach the front of the line.

"For My thoughts are not your thoughts, Nor are your ways My ways," declares the LORD. "For as the heavens are higher than the earth, So are My ways higher than your ways. And My thoughts than your thoughts. Isaiah 55:7-9

Jacob said, "Please tell me your name." But he replied, "Why do you ask my name?" Then he blessed him there. Genesis 32:28-30

Hide or See?

It's the morning after...World Autism Awareness Day. Yesterday, I was betwixt and beholden to post something, anything....but not knowing quite what?

I actually struggled all week with procrastination. My husband's absence on a two week surfari and several extra writing projects (Form 1023 for a 501 C3, brochure copy, and website for Banding Together) have combined to erect a sizable writer's blockade in my mind. My expressive language may be delayed but the receptive is graciously intact; I am still reading my RSS feed! Listening to this talk by Jess Wilson's at the Greater Hartford Autism Speaks Walk Kickoff released the floodgates for me:




So, I pray this morning after and all month (since April is Autism Awareness Month), that people will take that momentous first step and be more aware. As Jess says, "awareness is not the end goal but the first step." Like a parent witnessing a toddler take her first wobbly steps, I audibly gasped to open a post yesterday on the Living Proof Ministry blog. To my surprised delight, Beth Moore, the mega-Bible teacher, acknowledged World Autism Awareness Day by sharing the testimony of a mom and a call for prayers in the comment field for others experiencing autism. I love it when worlds collide like that and I hear about autism (my one planet) in an evangelical faith blog (my other zone) or in my husband's surfing environmentalism sphere. Truly, that cross pollination is evidence of growing awareness.

I spoke a couple weeks ago to the Mothers of Preschoolers (MOPS) group that meets at our church. The topic they gave me was "Raising a Special Needs Child." Knowing there'd only be a few in the audience who'd consider themselves in that category (in those tender years), I tried to generalize my points to make them more widely applicable. At the outset, I asked for a show of hands, "how many of you know a child with autism...be it neighbor, cousin, nephew, or classmate?" I was stunned when 80% of the hands went up. Had I known, I might have prepared differently and shared our story with an emphasis on "ways to help a child with autism." Next time:)

As Jess Wilson mentions, this is why we tell our stories, it is why we blog, and why we don't hide in our houses. Our transparency and willingness to be vulnerable in our own circles of influence, are how awareness happens. If the world is ever going to be a hospitable place for our kids to live independently, we need to educate. If awareness is the first step, then the ultimate goal is full inclusion.

I've been convicted lately within our church of ways that I have chosen to cop out and take the easier path of hiding, rather than doing the instruction that must precede inclusion. We practice our own avoidance strategies don't we? First for survival, and then out of habit. For example, my family has not been to an All Church Retreat in 11 years. Reid has not been included with his same age peers in Sunday school since 3rd grade. At that point it seemed easier to keep him with us in the sanctuary, under the shelter of our wings, so to speak. To side-step the unstructured, choatic coffee hour, we've taken the liberty of letting him watch a video in an empty upper room. Not too many people are "aware" of this arrangement; Reid is truly out of sight out of mind, for them.

Granted, it is emotionally draining to be exposed all the time. And educators have a high burn out rate. Lately though I am feeling that in our family, we've reached a tipping point where our "hiding" is doing a disservice to Reid and to others. In the name of self-preservation, I have robbed our friends and community of powerful, life-changing interactions that God may have intended for their personal growth.

Biblically speaking, my son (and everyone of us) is indispensable to the body of Christ. For a time-- in my exhaustion, isolation, and vulnerability to the Enemy--I bought the lie that it was selfish for me to ask for extra staff, a buddy, or modifications in order for Reid to participate in church events. I am beginning to see that without realizing it, I may have denied others the opportunity "to receive the gift of Reid" in the words of our senior high youth director. The truth is: it is actually prideful of me to take care of it myself.

It's the morning after...what have you learned?



The eye cannot say to the hand, "I don't need you!" And the head cannot say to the feet, "I don't need you!" On the contrary, those parts of the body that seem to be weaker are indispensable, and the parts that we think are less honorable we treat with special honor. 1 Corinthians 12:21-23


God made my life complete when I placed all the pieces before him. When I got my act together, he gave me a fresh start. Now I'm alert to God's ways; I don't take God for granted. Every day I review the ways he works; I try not to miss a trick. I feel put back together, and I'm watching my step. God rewrote the text of my life when I opened the book of my heart to his eyes. 2 Samuel 22:20-22 and Psalm 18:19-21 The Message


So if I, your Lord and Teacher, have washed your feet, you also ought to wash one another's feet. For I have given you an example that you also should do just as I have done for you. " I assure you: A slave is not greater than his master, and a messenger is not greater than the one who sent him. If you know these things, you are blessed if you do them. John 13:15-17

Praying with Lior

Praying with Lior, is an awesome film about the Bar Mitzvah and life ministry of a young man with Down Syndrome. His full inclusion at a Jewish day school, the importance of his community, and his charisma are powerful examples to me of God's kingdom come, God's will being done on earth.

Lior's honest candor and sense of humor warm my heart and draw me to a God in whose image He is surely made. As his Dad says, "he's not stupid; retarded, but not stupid. There's a difference." Ilana Trachtman interviews Lior here, fielding questions about the production and their first meeting.

What a thoughful disability awareness curriculum this study guide of questions and verses from the Old Testament would be for teens coming of age in either the Old or New Testament tradition. Lior has an undeniable spiritual gift of wisdom. What strikes me anew, as it did during Reid's preparation for baptism, is how marvelous it is that the Bible is at once complex and simple. Reid, through the purity of his testimony song and Lior, through his innate preaching distill it to the fundamentals.

As much as I wrote about Reid's baptism, I do not think I ever posted the resulting video. To our immense gratitude, one of the pastors at the beach that day said, "the whole congregation must see this." He arranged for the professional recording of Reid in our family room so this slideshow was shown on New Member Sunday. The ironic twist for me was that after many years of whining and complaining for programs at church that would serve Reid, now as he comes of age, he is in fact, ministering to the church body. God turned upside down and inside out, what I thought I wanted or we deserved. A kind of ministry was born in which he was serving rather than being served.





And he stood and blessed all the assembly of Israel with a loud voice, saying... 1 Kings 8:54-56


The law of the LORD is perfect, restoring the soul; The testimony of the LORD is sure, making wise the simple. Psalm 19:6-8




...but God has chosen the foolish things of the world to shame the wise, and God has chosen the weak things of the world to shame the things which are strong, 1 Corinthians 1:26-28

Free to Fly with the Wind

I am going to free myself up from my self-imposed template of length and structure for awhile, in favor of being more prolific and getting more posts out to you.

This story in the LA Times of a blind runner competing on a high school track team underscores the irony that in order to run with the chariots or really be free, we must in fact be tethered. Liberation for me, comes from being bound like an ox to Christ. When we submit to His yoke, our burdens lose their weight and we are finally on course. Read it and well up as I did at the beauty of her ambition and gratitude, the coach's resolve and resilience, the teammates' compassion and character development that are all perfectly woven together for good as the Father designed in advance. The story is also covered here in Breaking Christian News with a different slant.

It is for freedom that Christ has set us free. Stand firm, then, and do not let yourselves be burdened again by a yoke of slavery. Galatians 5:1-3

Interesting that like God, the runner knows each helper by name.

And the LORD said to Moses, "I will do the very thing you have asked, because I am pleased with you and I know you by name." Exodus 33:16-18

And how naturally inclusion flows out of the Coach Sramek's expectation of mutual respect and manners from his players.

As he went along, he saw a man blind from birth. His disciples asked him, "Rabbi, who sinned, this man or his parents, that he was born blind? Neither this man nor his parents sinned," said Jesus, "but this happened so that the works of God might be displayed in him. John 9:1-3

"2 BY 2"

No sooner had I posted the article on Bittersweet Farms in Ohio than I received this one about the L'Arche community in Tacoma, Washington. Residents maintain a farm, create and sell products at local farmer's markets, and engage in meaningful relationships. They are a family group committed to a simple life and conscious of spirituality. Why does this ring a bell? After a bit of research and head tapping, I remembered. L'Arche is the place that inspired several of Henri Nouwen's books (one of which I read years ago before my interest in autism). He is one of the fathers of contemplative spirituality. While living with people with developmental disabilities, Nouwen's understanding of service, relationship, connectedness, faith and Christ-likeness was redefined. He writes about how he benefited from their presence.

L'Arche is an international network of 133 communities founded by Jean Vanier in France in 1964. The journal of Nouwen's year at L’Arche Trosly is captured in The Road to Daybreak: A Spiritual Journey. Another book, Adam, God's Beloved, is an inspiring account of how his life was transformed through friendship with a core member of the L'Arche Daybreak community in Toronto. I love the empowerment and inclusion that is integral to their philosophy; they are intentional about creating mutually beneficial relationship and developing the unique gifts of each individual. Amen to that! The L'Arche story is told in depth in this excellent 14 minute interview.

L'Arche means "the ark" in French. My license plates have read "2 BY 2" since my kids were a year old. The selection of these vanity plates is a triple entendre. I'm not sure the average passerby gets any of the three references. More than once, men have chuckled and commented on my plates thinking I am making an anti-4-wheeler statement, as if to say, "Awww that's cute...she only has 2-wheel drive." Little do they know, it referred to the lovely picture book we read every night at bedtime, Twins: Two by Two by Catherine and Laurence Anholt. Their whimsical illustrations of boy and girl twins (like ours) show them role playing various species: crocodiles splashing in the bathroom, kangaroos jumping into bed, and mice all curled up asleep. Memories...!

The 2 BY 2 plates were also a more overt reference to Noah's ark in celebration of our babies arriving as a pair. Our vehicle was decked with double car seats and life felt suddenly like an epic adventure. As it was for those boarding Noah's ark, we distinctly felt that God was intervening in Allie and Reid's lives. He was lifting them, as it were, through adoption, from one setting to quite another for reasons they could not understand.

Thirdly, 2 BY 2 is a Biblical reference to the way Jesus sent out his disciples. Never alone, always in pairs, they were sent to spread the good news. It continues to comfort me to know we are not alone either in whatever task he calls us to do.

So, the L'Arche concept resonates on many levels. Is there one near you? Has anyone had personal experience with L'Arche?


"After this the Lord appointed seventy-two others and send them two by two ahead of him to every town and place where he was about to go." Luke 10:1-3


"...they went into the ark to Noah by twos, male and female, as God had commanded Noah. Genesis 7:8-10


"Blessed are the meek, for they will inherit the earth." Matthew 5:4-6

photo credit: www.larche.org; www.anholt.co.uk

Summer Shorts 5

'I tell you the truth, whatever you did for one of the least of these brothers of mine, you did for me.' Matthew 25:39-41




Do to others as you would have them do to you.
Luke 6:30-32




If someone forces you to go one mile, go with him two miles.
Matthew 5:40-42

Summer Shorts 1

If one falls down, his friend can help him up. But pity the man who falls and has no one to help him up! Ecclesiastes 4:9-11



But when you give a banquet, invite the poor, the crippled, the lame, the blind, Luke 14:12-14



And His disciples asked Him, "Rabbi, who sinned, this man or his parents, that he would be born blind? Jesus answered, "It was neither that this man sinned, nor his parents; but it was so that the works of God might be displayed in him. John 9:2-3